How Do I Know If It’s Trauma? Untangling the Confusion of What Happened to You

Social media has helped many people access a better understanding of counseling terms like attachment styles, high-functioning anxiety, and trauma. However, being flooded with information online can also lead to definition fatigue and confusion. In my work as a trauma-focused therapist in Nashville, I’ve had many clients come into session assuming they never experienced trauma, until a story or statement shared online resonated with them, and suddenly they are full of questions: Can what I experienced really be labeled as traumatic? What are the signs of trauma? Do I need trauma therapy?

In the past, the word “trauma” was often reserved for first responders, veterans, or survivors of major accidents. As the field of counseling has evolved, we have come to understand trauma in much broader, more inclusive terms. This shift has had a twofold impact: more people are discovering that their experiences are valid forms of trauma, and more individuals, especially women and those in high-pressure fields like the music industry, are seeking trauma-focused therapies like EMDR and Brainspotting. 

What Is the Definition of Trauma?

There are many ways to define trauma. In my practice as a trauma therapist, this is the definition that I share with clients:

Trauma is the result of witnessing or experiencing an event that overwhelms the nervous system’s ability to process and cope in the moment. This can be a one-time event (like a car accident) or a recurring and ongoing exposure to trauma (such as childhood neglect or a toxic work environment), which we refer to as complex trauma.

This next part is important: trauma isn’t necessarily about the event itself, but about the impact and perception of the event on the person. Let’s say two people experience the same accident; one may walk away shaken yet regulated, while the other walks away with a lasting imprint or “wound” (the literal Greek translation of trauma) based on how that experience uniquely impacted the person experiencing it.

In other words, trauma isn’t defined by the event, but by the lasting impact of the event on that individual person. With this understanding of trauma, it is important to note that trauma is not a choice or a sign of weakness. It is a physiological response to an overwhelming experience determined by several biological-, environmental- and historical-contextual factors.

What Are the Signs & Symptoms of Trauma?

You may be familiar with the “textbook” signs of trauma: flashbacks, nightmares, and hyper-vigilance. However, trauma symptoms can show up different than we expect it to, especially for high-achieving women and professionals.

If any of these signs of trauma sound familiar, you are not broken. You are someone whose nervous system has learned to adapt to survive.

If I Experienced Trauma, Do I Have PTSD?

Possibly, but not always. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD, is a mental health disorder diagnosed by meeting the symptom criteria assessed by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5-TR). Trauma is a more general term to define the impact of experiencing a life-threatening or overwhelming event. You can experience trauma or “have trauma” without having a PTSD diagnosis. An official PTSD diagnosis requires a full assessment by a trained mental health professional, such as a psychiatrist or licensed professional counselor – mental health service provider (LPC-MHSP). It is not necessary to have a PTSD diagnosis to receive trauma therapy.

When Is It Time to Seek Trauma Therapy?

Becoming aware of these symptoms is the first step toward trauma recovery. The next step is evaluating how these symptoms interfere with your daily life. Consider what symptoms you’ve noticed and ask yourself:

• Do they keep you from the relationships you hope for?
• Do you find yourself saying “no” to opportunities in your personal or professional life because you don’t feel safe or secure?
• Do you avoid certain things out of fear, leaving you more isolated and unfulfilled?

Trauma disconnects us from ourselves and others when it goes untreated. When your survival strategies begin to interfere with your ability to live a full, authentic life, it is a good time to pursue therapy. 

How Trauma Therapies like EMDR & Brainspotting Help

Trauma is inherently chaotic. We can carry it like a “tangled ball of yarn” in the mind. Trauma therapy helps you untangle, reorganize and better understand these experiences so you can feel empowered over your own story of what happened to you.

A common misconception is that you have to retell every painful detail of your story to heal. In reality, effective trauma therapy, specifically EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) and Brainspotting, does not require you to verbalize everything. Instead, we focus on:

• Building Safety: Developing grounding tools and resources to stabilize your nervous system.
• Reprocessing: Addressing the distressing sensations, emotions, and memory fragments held in the mind and body, and helping them find their way forward and out of their stuck places.
• Integration: Taking what you experienced and learned from reprocessing and weaving it into a compassionate and holistic understanding of who you are and your place in the world. This is where we see previously held unhealthy thought processes, behaviors and beliefs truly shift.

Recovering Your Sense of Self Through Trauma Therapy

Discovering you’ve experienced trauma can be daunting. You may be wondering where you go from here, or still questioning whether what you experienced truly “counts” as trauma. Trauma-informed therapy can address this pattern of confusion and self-minimization, leading you to a place of clarity, confidence and lasting healing.

Seeking trauma-informed care is important as it shifts the guiding question of treatment from “what is wrong with me?” to an understanding of “what happened to me?” While trauma is a part of your story, but it is not the whole story of who you are. Trauma-informed therapy can help you separate your identity from your past experiences, allowing you to step back into your life with a sense of agency and peace.

---

Julia Langner at Three Cords Therapy is a trauma-informed therapist offering trauma-focused therapy in Nashville, Tennessee.

• Learn more about Julia or her approach to trauma-informed care.
• Ready to explore what trauma-focused therapy could look like for you? If you are a client in Nashville, Tennessee reach out for a free 15-minute consultation.